Keep Calm and Carry On

Hello Hello!

London was awesome. Thanks for asking! Probably the last cool place I'll have traveled to for a while. :(
I'm going to boast here and tell you how in the last two years I've travelled around the East Coast of the USA, Malaysia, Singapore, Istanbul, Barcelona and the UK :). Friends only. :D

Well, when i was roaming around the beautiful Hogwarts-y streets of Cambridge, I randomly came across an interesting christmas window. Keep Calm posters all over it. 
I love the Keep Calm Poster. What a pass.

The story behind this propoganda poster is that it was released by the British government to comfort and inspire the populace in times of real crisis. The most interesting part is that it was never really released. Only made it to a few walls in a few government offices. Randomly a bookshop owner found it with some books he bought at an auction and Behold! It's everywhere.


I love the parodies more than the real thing. These are my favourites.

1) Because Violence is the Answer to EVERYTHING.

2) And Google can answer even that which is not a question.

3) Because only a Super Hero can Save the World.

4) And when the world is fine and you need saving, cupcakes cure everything.

5) Or you could just buy things.


This post was to fondly commmemmorate 99 posts for me. And to remind myself that i need to Keep Calm and Blog On.

Ridiculous people

They have crazy emotions, expressions and even weirder ways of expressing them.
Extremely fascinating.
In one of my theorizing-with-self sessions, I settled on my list of people who i find absolutely ridiculous.
Here it is-

People Who Claim to be Emo

 Dude. No. You don't have the saddest, most screwed up life in the world. No, breaking up with your 6 month old boyfriend doesn't not give you license to show your sadomasochistic tendencies. NOBODY FEELS SORRY FOR YOU.
You probably just need a blow up doll.
And wear a little less kohl.
And get a haircut.
I blame it on Avril Lavigne.






"MUAAAHHH, BABES"

I mean, seriously?
Babes is plural.
Babezzzz is not the right spelling.
Muah is a way to write something with sounds like a kiss. You dont say "mooo-aaa"
And if you're male, you might want to check if it's just your anatomy that's male.
Also your sexual orientation.

Anyone who's above 20 and chooses to wear a hairband with a bow on it.

And polka dot hairbands.
And pink frilly frocks. (No, they don't qualify as dresses"
And then they pose with a pout in the bathroom mirror.
WHEREVER they find a bathroom.
DUDE.
If you're past that age and still love all that. Wait to dress your daughter up.
Or get a doll.

NO. You aren't Blair Waldorf


Whiny bloggers

Sad, depressing tales of their life. Blogging for extra sympathy.
But i guess everyone has license for that on the internet.
They probably have more of a life on the internet.

Anyone who's barely pubescent and believes he/she has found true love

And then they 'Like' those weird romantic lines on facebook.
And have those cheeseball status updates.
And they probably get more action than a lot of 20 year olds.
And have marriage plans.
And have settled on baby names.
OH wait. They haven't discovered the joys of breaking up yet.

You know you think so too.

People I just Can't take Seriously

Sometimes, I wonder if my attempts to be funny on this blog fail miserably.
Or if they make me sound like a fool
Or shallow or something
Then Again I really don't want to know if I'm crappy at it =P
I also don't care much...

You, of course, are reading my blog because-
a) You're Awesome (I'm a Traffic Whore. Deal with it)
b) I'm awesome and you like knowing my opinion on life the universe and everything.

This post will tell you about the 5 kinds of people I just CANNOT take seriously.

1. Men who make a middle parting in their hair

Found Image on Google Images. Praying I don't get sued for defamation.

Looks worse when oiled.
I mean, no offence and all that. But if you look like that, it really is hard to take you seriously

2. Boys who wear briefs not boxers.

You know you think so too. (Disclaimer: This is not an original idea)

3. Boys shorter than 5ft 9inches

Courtesy Chetna.

Seriously!! What's the point? The girl will always feel bad about never being able to wear heels.

And really. Doesn't fit into my stereotypical image of masculinity. Just does not.

4. Grown-ups wearing Crocs.

Not allowed unless you're a gardener. Or are in Disney World.

5. Liverpool Fans

Need I say anything more? But then again...

PS-When you're doing nothing and like doodles and cartoons and funny pictures, you should visit www.davidshrigley.com
He's pretty awesome.

Smart has the Brains. Stupid has the Balls. Be stupid.

This, my friends, is the best ad campaign I have seen in the longest time.
I mean, look at the ingenuity.
Just plain brilliant.
Now, my opinion of Diesel as a brand and the kind of clothes they make isn't the best. So, the first time I saw this ad campaign this scene played out in my head.
Advertising guys hired by them sitting in a room.
Guy 1: This is friggin' pissing off. What the pops is going to grab eyeballs?
Guy 2: True. Even the clothes are ugly. I mean, who wears diesel anyway? Torn overpriced clothes.
Guy 3: Stupid People.
*An 'idea-light bulb' moment*


But, what might have started as a joke has now become one of my favourite ad campaigns EVER.
Just see- Just see-

My love for this campaign may stem from my love of stupid people. But really, this should be the gospel of life.

Being stupid is being smart.

Be stupid.

small post- sorry

So, what is the purpose of advertising?

Getting people to buy what your selling right?

so WHY in the world would you put a picture like this on your product page.

It grosses me out so much, i want to avert my eyes, forget buy this product.

Btw- its an ad for a mosquito repellant.

I was on that page because the mosquitoes on campus nowadays are keeping me occupied.

Real Blonde Moments. Everyone has them.

I understand intellectualism and meaningful conversation and high IQs and I have a whole lot of those people around me a lot of time but really, don't you think you have more fun when you're actually NOT that smart?

 

Some moments in my life give the "blondes have more fun" cliché so much more weight.

  

I mean, wouldn't you really for one moment in your life at least, want to forget the difference between communism and communalism?

or for that matter,

not get a really smart joke someone made and have it explained to you?

or 

look for the pencil which is tucked behind your ear?

or 

want to say "I" when someone asks you the capital of India?

 

Life would be so much simpler then.

Minimum information. Minimum Expectation. Maximum Fun.

It's Cool Plane Story Time!

So,

you know how some of the coolest stories come from incidents that take place in aeroplanes?

up above the world so high, like a birdie in the sky?

Yup..... I have one more of those.

You don't know the first. So , more doesnt apply to you.

IF you MUST know,

i met one of my best friends on a flight to Paris. Like she was the random stranger who was sitting next to me on the plane and talkative that i am, i talked her ears off.

We just exchanged email ids and lo! We ended up being in St. Xavier's College together for two years :).

So we're cool plane buddies and everything. (Do NOT call us lame. I know you want a plane buddy too!)

Ok, that apart.

Let's now tell you the story, im blogging about.

Now you know home for me is Bombay. Hostel for me is Bangalore.

I was home for the long independence day weekend. And it was time to go back to Law School. I was sad i was leaving home but glad i was going back because i had begun to miss the place thoda thoda.

I checked in my baggage with my friends, finished security check and boarded the plane. The plane took off and an hour and half later, it safely landed at Bengaluru Airport.

Ok, the story is definitely not that boring.

So, the funny part.

Once we landed, i inserted my bangalore sim card back into my phone and switched it on only to be BOMBARDED with messages saying,

"Welcome to Bangalore Guys! :)

I spoke to your Moms fifteen minutes after you boarded.

College is closed for the next twelve days.

Time to go home :)"

So,

we walk out of the plane, take the bags from baggage claim, walk out of the airport towards departures, buy tickets to go back to Bombay immediately. We had a couple of hours so we grabbed a Kaati Roll. Ate, checked in, security check and came straight back home.

So, we travelled to Bengaluru for the purpose of eating a Kaati Roll? One expensive Kaati Roll that was.

And NO. We were not playing "Flight Flight".

So, this is me. Blogging with a lot of louve for my readers. The kind of louve that comes from a good night's sleep, having nothing to do and getting milk in bed, all at home. Home Sweet Home.

PS- miss me 9834y92837402394985 till i post again.

much love.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

Law School is a Funny place to be

so, if you think law students are exceptionally boring people mired in gloom, surrounded by books and have no life-
You are pretty much right.
But that doesn't mean law school is not a ridiculously funny place to be at.
i can elaborate-

Take only today for example.

EVENT ONE
3.00 AM

tired, sleepy, hungry i was watching How I Met Your Mother. I thought i'd watch just one more episode (that shit is addictive) and then fall asleep on my amazingly uncomfortable bed (which also creaks just BTW)
AND THEN-

*knock knock*

cursing inside of my head, i put the laptop aside and got up to check who it was. I mean- who'd come to annoy me at 3.00 AM??!

I opened the door and LO!
it was a very stoned senior.
giggling
Senior:"Niyati!!!!"
Me:"Hello" I said.(faking a smile. you don't want to mess with seniors just yet)
*giggle*
Senior:"i was just watching tv"
me:"you reek of smoke"
Senior:"Really!!?" *giggle*
me:"you reek of other substances as well"(it was an attempt to tell her i could smell the weed)
Senior:"shhhhhhhhhhhhh.....Don't tell anyone"*giggle*
me:"do you want something? And you do realise this building isn't where you live na?"
Senior:"i'm going. But do you have some food?"

so saying, i handed her a jar of biscuits and sent her to bed.

EVENT TWO
10.08 AM

This one doesn't really deserve detail. In short-
we have a nice, bald teacher who has this annoying habit of calling us all his friends. Bored out of our wits, Viraj and I were making tally marks everytime he used the word.
our conclusion- ya. he uses the word friend once every 2.4 minutes.

EVENT THREE
3.00 PM

We're in a ridiculously dull "How to write Projects" extra class. She's telling us how we list our primary sources and secondary sources in a term paper and randomly John Techi runs out of class.
I poked Dheer and Vikram who were sitting (to their misfortune) in front of me and asked where Techi ran.(for the record, Techi is THE MAN)
They told me he ran out as he REALLY had to pee.
ordinary thing, so i just giggled generally.
Then he walks back in and the teacher confiscates his phone.
Ya. Techi ran out to take a call. From a friend. In the middle of class. With NO warning.
SAMPLES I TELL YOU.

So, the day's just barely half-way through and its already been quite eventful.
Law Students aren't THAT boring after all.
Cut us some slack.